She wrote this piece to explain how the hospice in the home team, like rapid response clinical nurse specialist Richard (pictured) supported the family at their home in the Tendring area.

 We met in March 1986, married in 1964 and moved to the Tendring area. We were together for 60 years almost to the day. We were blessed with a son and a daughter and enjoyed a long and loving marriage. Life threw a few things at us, as it does to everyone, but we always worked together to get through life’s highs and lows. In time we were blessed with a granddaughter to whom A was devoted. They were really good pals from the day she was born and I am so grateful she filled the last years of his life with love, joy and laughter.

Many years ago A had a heart attack out of the blue but the miracle of modern medicine and technology kept him alive and reasonably fit until the last few years. Obviously age plays a part in declining health but the last 2-3 years became very worrying and I’m sure we visited every hospital department except maternity but nobody came up with any answers. It was not until three and half weeks before his life ended that we had a final diagnosis from the hospital. The consultant was very kind and gentle with us but it was clear also what the outcome was going to be. It seemed to take a few days before it became clear St Helena was going to be looking after us, as A had always said, thankfully, he wished to stay at home. I could not have stood aside and let strangers, as kind as they may be, to do all the caring side. 

When I finally slid into bed in the early hours of the morning. Little did I know this was the last night we would be together. When I awoke at 9am his body had lost the strength to fight anymore. Our dearest husband, father and grandad rested in peace.

Do not wait for a funeral to voice your feelings. Tell your loved one whilst the can see your smile, feel the gentle touch of your hand, and hear the love in your voice.

Even after his death the hospice guided us through the necessary procedures that follow. In the worst time of our lives we did not feel alone. Thank you to all at St Helena for supporting A and his family along the path. Thank you to all family and friends for continuing to support us. And thank you to A for his deep, unfailing love.